…and on a lighter note.

On Friday I met up with my student, Rachel who I have worked with for three years. She is moving to Manchester and going to finish her degree at Manchester University. I thought I would be sad to have our last coffee/tea but the day was nice. After meeting up in Costa and I having a cappuccino and toasted tea cake, we headed into town and to Leaf, a tea shop in Liverpool! I had not been there before and the cafe/restaurant was very bohemian. The tea we ordered came in neat little pots and it was nice to see fresh ingredients being used.

I had a migraine all evening, probably with all the caffeine. lol

Saturday and David has been working all day on putting his TV on the chimney breast. No DIY job goes smoothly in a 1901 house!!

In the garden. My Azalea is looking wonderful and David’s Acer is sprouting back to life!

For the evening dinner I decided to dress up for the curry we had, and in the garden David took a picture. Do I look like a nymph or an alien??

 

It’s Been a Strange Sort of Day.

David has exhausted himself with crying over Muzzy (the cat), and that has left him very little time for me. 😦

It’s a good job I have a ‘very’ active inner imagination isn’t it?

What has got me through the night has been the promise of writing (though I have not done any! Would you want to write about Victorian asylums after seeing death?), wine and music!! Oh and the odd sexual fantasy… but you all know my ‘one’ weakness! :p

This afternoon, I managed to blank out the sad events that I knew would come from going to the vets later in the evening. (I have done it far too much in the past few years!) I sat in the yard and enjoyed the strong spring sun. It has been such a lovely day in Liverpool. (If I recall my father died on a similar day to this!) I read a chapter of a novel, sipped some ‘not so’ fermented apple juice and chomped on a sliver of melon. The sun was warm! Even though I had sunscreen on, I think I have turned a little pink!! :0

It was nice sitting in the sun. I noticed that Hover-flies were dancing around my Wallflower and Magnolia, (they are pollinators too, it’s not just bees!) I am so overjoyed that at least I can make something happy!! My planting for wildlife is making a ‘small’ difference!! It has to be better than nothing? Right?

I enjoyed looking at the colours of my flowers. My Scabiosa is blooming with more flower heads. The Aubrieta is glowing with purple flowers and my Aquilegia has been growing daily. Every morning when I roll up the kitchen blind when I awake for breakfast, I have watched the Aquilegia grow higher and higher. Now it has flower buds on it and I can’t wait for them to open. They make such beautiful flowers! I am so happy that this plant is such a vibrant grower. I could not but notice that my Azalea had also blossomed. It’s flowers are not unlike the Rhododendron.

There is a lot to be thankful for in my life. Though I may complain (often), it could be much worse!

Christine xx

I hate making hard decisions…

…but sometimes they just have to be made. I had postponed the inevitable for two weeks over Easter as when I broached the subject with David, he fell to pieces!

David has never really known what it is like to be a pet owner and animal lover. I have lived with animals all my life and though the end decision is difficult, it is one that every loving owner must face. You have to put aside your own heartache and the sadness and think of the animal. Are they in pain? Are they suffering?

I think Muzzy was!

RIP 6/2000 to 4/2014

She had been ailing for some time, had grown thin and her breathing had become erratic. As we don’t see Muzzy every day (my cats live with mum next door as they are too old to move into the new house), seeing Muzzy and her condition startled me! So today I knew I had to put my foot down and say ‘no’ to sentimentality! Enough was enough! ‘The cat comes first!’

We were booked in for 5pm at Adams Vets. We have been there many times before and they have always been kind and considerate. Today was no different.

David after work, drove us through a waterfall of his own tears. Mum and I went in and were given our own room to be with Muzzy before the vet came to see her. The vet was calm and listened to Muzzy’s heart. She said that there was fluid on the lungs and in her tummy, indicative of a failing heart! I had thought as much as we have seen it before in another one of our cats. His name was Jo and his death was horrific! It was something I did not want to see again!

The vet took Muzzy away for a catheter and when she came back, Muzzy was all wrapped up in a green blanket. I stroked Muzzy and kissed her head, whispering ‘she will be at peace soon.’ The vet injected the anaesthetic and in half a minute Muzzy’s head had slumped onto my arm and her chest had stopped rising. Mum was upset and I put on the ‘stiff upper lip’.

Home now and David is asleep on the couch, all the crying has spent his energy. I’ll probably have a cry later after a drink and a shower. I find that in these situations, it is always me that has to be the strong one and my emotions never come out as easily as they should.

I know Muzzy is at peace now, no more struggling for air. I think she has had a good innings with us. She was not a kitten when we got her. I was in another vets with a hamster in the summer of 2000 and someone brought Muzzy into the surgery saying ‘she was a stray and had been crying all day.’ I knew then that she would be part of my family. We asked the vet at the time if we could have her, and after a quick check up. I came home hamster-less but with a new addition to my ever growing cat family. Muzzy was with us for 14 years and I think she had a better life than if she was still a stray!

Love you lots Muzzy! xx

Easter Monday… a brighter day!

Today was spent looking for abstract art for the garden and coming back with bird seed and plants!

We visited Dobbies and B&M firstly. I find Dobbies quite expensive. I think we should have gone to Lady Green!! I still need a Phlox for the garden!

Then David said ‘we’re close to Widnes and more garden centres’, so we put the satnav on and went to two other garden shops, however came back with nothing!

Power station and Rape Seed field in Widnes

David is still worrying about the TV and the chimney breast. It does not help with me freaking out, saying the whole chimney will cave in if not supported!! After lunch we visited B&Q in search of answers to David’s chimney problem and we came back with a Scabiosa and Lupin for the garden.  I am happy now that there is lots of colour in the garden!

 

Later that afternoon, I managed to soak up some vitamin D! I sat outside in the garden, did some reading (Kate Morton’s The Secret Keeper), ate strawberries, drank wine and listened to the Classic FM ‘Hall of Fame 2014‘ 😀 I am very excited. I wonder who will be at number one? Rachmaninov’s Piano Concerto Number 2, I hope! 🙂

I had voted for Samuel Barber’s Adagio for Strings, but it only got to number 15!

Happy Easter…everyone!

I was looking forward to sending the long four day Easter break with David. I had hoped we would spend the time together, having fun. It was not meant to be.

The Friday started off ok, visiting family and doling out the simnel cakes I had made for everyone. I even sat out in the yard and enjoyed the warm spring sun with a glass of wine and Classic FM’s ‘Hall of Fame‘ playing in the background! 😀

 

 

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However the rest of the weekend was mired with worry over the living room fireplace, where David was trying to put his TV on the breast. He drilled in four holes for the bracket and found that behind was hollow with bricks falling down!! It did not help matters that I was snapping like a crocodile due to ‘that time of the month’ slowly approaching!

Sunday, Easter Day was a cloudy affair, though I noticed in my garden that things were slowly coming back to life! My Aubrieta, which I thought was dying has sprung into purple flowers and my lovely Magnolia tree is budding with small white flowers. 🙂

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Small wonders!

Trying to Keep the Black Dog at Bay!

I have been rather depressed this week with one thing and another. It has left me feeling rather headachey and stressed out about money. Work at the University finished on Friday, nice for a three week break but I don’t know whether I have any hours after that. I really need to find another job to cover me for over the summer, otherwise the trip to Scotland, Aberdeen’s Wild Dolphins and The Kelipes, with a quick visit to Edinburgh will not go ahead and I will be bereft. 😦

This weekend has all been about keeping the Black Dog at bay. If you feel down, ‘do something that you are good at’ I say, ‘something you enjoy.’ So on Saturday after shopping, cleaning the house, and exercising for 30 minutes I cooked David and I a meal of honey glazed mustard trout, (called Jack) with salad, vegetables and new potatoes.

For the glaze I mixed two tablespoons of lemon juice with two teaspoons of mustard and a tablespoon of honey. Then I smeared it over two fillets of Trout. Cooked it in a 180 degrees oven for 15 minutes. Boiled the potatoes and made the salad.

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I ordained the table with napkins in the shape of peacocks, (well what I tried to look like peacocks anyway), had a nice glass of wine and poured David a cool glass of Pepsi.

I even dressed up! I bought the dress from Jane Norman years ago and had it taken up, (as I am short) but thought it was taken up too much. I found that it fitted me well. I felt very glamorous and sexy!

Sunday and it was the birthday of my favourite actor 🙂 David went to help his brother with his house and I relaxed home alone. I had a nice soak in the bath, with Classic FM playing and a glass of wine in hand. Afterwards I made a loaf of bread. My finest yet! Then chopped up many vegetables and made Blind Scouse! It was very filling!

 

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Re: Gardening. I was distressed to see a black ‘plague’ on my newly bought poppy. All the heads were eaten from it! Flowers are very expensive, especially if they die within weeks of purchase! But I am happy to see the Magnolia tree I bought has started to bloom. I just hope the weather changes for the better and we get some nice warm weather, and a bit of sun. So the flowers and myself can feel more ‘alive’ again!

 

Christine xx